Blinders are fine for a thoroughbred in the Preakness, but they're not fine for people who are working on their empire dot com.

Something weird happens when you start your online biz. Tunnel vision descends, and you focus solely on your screens to market your business. You're not seeing the world around you.

As she reads through the choices, her certainty of what she wants wanes. She scans the titles of each product and now she’s not sure what she really needs. Instead of making a decision and buying, she opens a new Google tab and searches for a Christmas pavlova recipe.

What a McDonald's customer pre-1949 and this woman experienced is what's known in psychology as the paradox of choice.

There's a subconscious belief that when everyone else is lined up and believing in you and your idea, that's when you'll dial it up and the biz will really take off.

In other words, getting other's approval means success.

Why do we desperately seek approval? It's what women have been taught to do to survive.

Their first drafts often come across as if they're knocking gently on someone's office door and asking in a soft voice, "Oh, hey, hi there. Um, sorry to bother you, but do you have a minute to listen to my idea? If not, I can come back later."

The "office," of course, is the inbox of their readers. Their whispered written words reveal they don't want to disturb their readers or take up “digital” space. They’re tip-toeing into the inbox and hoping like hell that no one is irritated.

Stop writing so that no one will negatively judge you.

Chairs screeched and spines twisted as everyone looked at the back of the room to see who had spoken, but no one was there.

We re-oriented ourselves to the front and exchanged glances of “Who the hell was that?

And suddenly, there she was.

Our instructor opera star floated through the front door with arms wide, soaking in our stares and a smile that could be seen from the back of the Sydney Opera House.